Gyms and Weight Training -- Take 2006... Camera Rolling

Mickey Hargitay
Mickey Hargitay, RIP

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The Drapers are flaking off again. Here it is Thursday and no newsletter. Where are they when you need them?

But wait, bombers! Give us a chance to explain. We were just about to press the “send” key, when a call came from AARP headquarters asking that we meet their video crew at The Weight Room to shoot footage for their website. After retrieving our jaws that had abruptly dropped to the floor, Laree and I embraced, declaring, “It’s for the cause, my love” and set off for the gym.

It was at 2 PM. The three-man team had enough equipment to film an epic. I was wearing a tight T-shirt and poised under the lights with my long-time friend and over-50 training partner, Wayne. The nine basic movements I included in the AARP Bulletin article were about to be demonstrated and explained. Oh, boy.

I explained; Wayne demonstrated. This act -- spontaneous, unrehearsed, unprepared -- went on for 6 hours. Lars, the cameraman and swell guy, was a professional looking for quality. Ha, he might as well be searching for buried treasure, the missing link, UFO, peace, cheap petroleum, a silk purse from a couple of pork chops.

Surrounded by long-limbed tripods with assorted lighting and shades and high density video gear, we slowly dissolved. It wasn’t long before I was muttering and Wayne was dragging. We were sprinters running our first marathon.

“Are we there yet?”

“Let’s do that again, gentlemen.”

I had hoped to make clear to the aging audience the need for weight training exercise without relying totally on those predictable themes, health and strength. I wanted to convey the deeper meaning, benefits and rewards of the amazing activity, revealing to them the hope and inspiration and joy to be found in the cold steel. The exciting truth is buried beneath the conventional notion that lifting weights is dull, time consuming and painful labor, unappealing and void of laughs.

As the time rolled by, I reached for the followings thoughts and watched them evaporate when the man said, “Camera rolling.”

Going to the gym is like going to school where we learn and grow. Going to the gym and lifting weights makes us whole. Going to the gym and lifting weights is a release and a diversion. The pair sustains us and maintains us. The gym is where we socialize, raucously or in silence.

Who among us would deny we go to the gym to improve our self-confidence? The insecure, I suppose. The gym is not a place of worship, but it is for many a place of refuge and meditation. The gym and its promise activate hope, a non-physical thing, which in turn activates the iron, a very physical thing. We go to the gym for mental and soulful fulfillment.

Working out is a good habit, pastime and hobby or a sport, a game, an athletic activity. When we don’t go to the gym and lift weights we feel crummy, really crummy. Weight training brings order to our otherwise chaotic life, fulfillment to the place where frustration seeks a foothold and desperation a stranglehold.

It all began with cool muscles and strength, which some of us call health and fitness. The gym is a swell place to build a swell physique. There was a time when nobody lifted weights, but a few steel-plated, iron-minded muscleheads. That was a very good time. Now everybody does and they haven’t a clue. The good times pass.

A scholar once said, “There is more instruction in a stack of weights than there is in a library of books.”

The wise man’s word declares, “To lift weights diligently is to lift one’s soul and dignity.”

We say, “Hey, buddy. Give me a lift-off on three. One, two and three... Ooph!”

Our buddy says, “You can do this... big drive... push... push... One more... push. Good!”

Did you ever wonder how little you’d understand about a lot of subjects you’d have never considered if you didn’t go to the gym and lift weights? Add them to this list.

There’s a friendly side of pain if you introduce it slowly over time and with purpose. Working out offers the perfect opportunity for such thoughtful and productive application.

The gym where intense training doth proceed builds discipline, determination and deltoids (the good Ds). The gym where workouts are mightily engaged disperses disappointment, discouragement and depression (the bad Ds).

The gym is alluring, weightlifting is seductive and we get “hooked,” as they say. We’re iron and steel addicts. We go to the gym for a fix. We also go to the gym to fix ourselves when we’re broken and the doc is out to lunch. The gym’s a neighborhood garage: It fuels our tank and charges our internal battery; it tunes the engine and increases the spark, cleanses the system and changes the oil. It removes the dents and scratches. Showtime!

When the direction we must go is not clear, we go to the gym and feel our way through the haze and clutter and cold steel. Grasping weights and groping bars provides a clarity our eyes have never known. We can see forever.

The gym and its worthy activities, thus, engender creativity and awareness and mental freedom and energy to shift into high gear and travel safely in the fast lane and go places we were once reluctant or incapable to go. What a trip!

It’s not uncommon for the individual and character who works out to be an individual and a character. This sure beats a miss and mister of the masses.

How neurotic would you be without the gym and consistent exercise? Gyms make the world a safer place.

Those who attend gyms and utilize the bars and plates and dumbbells generally eat smarter and live better lives. Gyms make the world a healthier place.

Lifting weights improves our hormonal balance, metabolic activity, neural-transmission, musculoskeletal system and cardiovascular system, all of which improve our mood and sense of wellbeing. Gyms make the world a happier place.

Going to the gym is like going to the circus sideshow of which we are a part. There’s the fat man, the skinny lady, the tattooed man, the strongman, the snake lady, the clowns, the monsters and the laughing couple on bikes. We are, of course, the sane ones in the corners who nobody notices. We press on.

It has been reported that girls go to gyms looking for guys. This is a rumor and has not yet been confirmed. Will keep you updated.

The gym is the foundry where with heated steel we form ourselves. The workouts give us balance in an unstable world in which inside is out and upside is down. Weight lifting draws us to our center from whence we express ourselves.

The gym is the stage upon which we act, act out and interact. The workouts are the battles we win consistently as we take the enemy down. Weightlifting is the thing we do and the road we travel unfamiliar to those around us.

We go to the gym to gain muscle and lose fat, to gain strength and increase speed, to improve energy and develop endurance, to suppress fear and overcome guilt, to rehabilitate injury and resist illness, to make friends and eliminate enemies, to kill time and enliven the spirit, to refresh, to restore and rebuild. We go to the gym to revive and survive and be alive.

Gyms have barbells and dumbbells, benches and racks, all of which build muscle and might, head to toe. Serious toys, serious joys.

Get this. Gyms have gadgets of incredible variety, complexity and oddness for doing just about everything and nothing at the same time. A person can often find loopy devices for entertainment or torture or magic or a distraction from reality. Don’t be fooled by new-wave, hi-tech gizmos or ideas. They are like mechanical idiots or brainy nerds running loose in a smart and simple place.

Going to the gym with our eyes half opened enables us to see the possibilities. Going to the gym regularly will open our eyes and awaken an abundance of purposes. The gym is a purpose-maker and the place to achieve them.

Some folks – not us – go to the gym because their spouses want them to, or their doctor commands them to, or ‘cuz it’s trendy, cool and impressive. Their eyes are half closed. They stand around the chrome dumbbells and chat and share recipes or congregate at the bench press and exchange stock tips and war stories. They are motivated, committed, engaged, dedicated, inspired, persevering and vigorous. They traveled across town, found a parking place, signed in, changed and stood in line for the stationary bike and water fountain, showered and departed. Exhausting! The novelty and sacrifice and devotion will last three weeks, tops. See ya!

Well, here we are a day late and all I managed to say was something like; "Hi, everybody... ah, umm... Weight training is nice. It is good for you... ah, umm. This is Wayne. See Wayne lift weights. Er, umm... lift, Wayne, lift. Watch Wayne's muscles grow. Ahh... er... Bend over and pick up the weights, Wayne. Weight lifting is fun. Hehe...

Sheesh! What a mutt.

When the gym is not in use we can remove the equipment and roll in our bombers, gliders and biplanes, whereupon we can dismantle them and put them back together again, or, as they say in hangar school, reassemble them. And, of course, every good gym has a runway nearby for take-offs and landings and potato-sack races. How much fun is that?

Now we know why we go to the gym and why we mess with the iron. It’s magnificent. That swoosh you hear is a bomber taking off.

God’s peace... dd...

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Join the feel-good phenomenon; support the remarkable upsurge in global spirits and wellbeing. Send for your P/D DVD today, along with your order of Bomber Blend and Super Spectrim vitamins, and keep the material in which they are wrapped free of charge.

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