Trivia, Nonsense and Gobbledegoop
From Don't Make Waves, this is the inside of Harry's (Dave) bus
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Unless we’re talking about a handful of bugs or a fistful of burning thistle, letting go is very hard to do. Ask the shop owner whose front door bears the sign “Out of Business,” or the mom and dad watching their loving child head off to college, or the young lad whose sweetheart has left him for another.
Of course, there are occasions when, “Phew… What a relief,” is the response. Finally, what took so long, hallelujah, good riddance and see ya often work well.
You want a picture of real anguish?
You betcha!
Imagine a bodybuilder who just turned 69; it’s Sunday afternoon and he’s on the way to the gym and he can’t remember where he last saw his gym bag… or car keys… or car. What gym? Who am I and what am I doing here?
“Laree… Let’s go to the gym for a workout. You drive!”
I’m just kidding. Laree trains at home with those kettlebell thingies.
I’m tough, bombos. I make it to the gym if I have to crawl. What I will do when I get there is the thistle-burning question. The ever-popular huge and ripped routine is unlikely, a record-setting bench press routine is probably not going to happen and my favorite squat/deadlift/overhead-press tri-set routine is looking kind of slim. Could always sit at the front counter and read the sports page, funnies, ads, lost ‘n found and obituaries, though not necessarily in that order.
I heard some old dude say that life after 65 becomes a routine. Yeah, right. I don’t think so. Routine in the life of a 69-year-old musclehead is impossible. Making a plan and expecting to keep it, particularly if it includes hefting iron, is more than a little ambitious; it’s downright arrogant. But that doesn’t mean we lose our touch, stop striving or fall apart.
That other old dude no doubt had 12-inch arms and never clutched a dumbbell. Ironheads might fade, but they never disappear.
I walk into the gym; thank God I made it, and sit quickly on anything that resembles a seat. At 2PM the benches are empty, part of my scheme -- sit anywhere, move slow, lift little, groan lots, lift less, moan more, and before I know it I’m warmed up and ready to go.
What I do next is not necessarily what is clearly outlined in my handy training log -- exercises A, B and C for X sets and reps. What I do is, 1) what I can do, 2) might be able to do and, 3) wish I could do that won’t disable me for 10 days. Not long ago, when I was new at this getting-older stuff, I narrowed my training down to whatever exercises don’t hurt. That is now known as ‘the fantasy workout.’
I’m joking, as usual. Hardy har har… Life is bundle of laughs and a stack of iron.
I still have quite a repertoire of movements I can do, providing I execute them sensibly – warm up, don’t go heavy (relative term), don’t go fast, don’t rush the training pace, don’t over-extend the range of motion, perform each set and rep with complete focus and awareness of any needed mid-rep movement modification (NMRMM). No smoking, no whiskey, no pets, no complaining. Drink your Bomber Blend, lift and shut up.
I have fully adjusted to handling light weights. My ego may be deflated, but I still get a pump. That I’ve arrived at the foot of the bar and hands of the dumbbells this day is most encouraging – astounding, actually. The keen execution of the movements and degree of exertion I consistently apply are the qualities I now attend and perfect. Perfection in less is still perfection; it makes less more.
If I go heavy in anything, I fail, or I achieve nothing, or I injure myself, or I wet my pants, or someone snickers, or an alarm goes off at the ER. Lighter weights enable right action for sufficient reps, a good pump and a diminished probability of damage or enduring pain, and a condition otherwise know as fulfillment. Fulfillment is just another 11-letter word for why we go to the gym.
Let’s face it, kids, where else do we get fulfillment from these days?
I can feel it in my bones. This is what will spell fulfillment for me today:
~ Rope tucks and lat rows supersetted with machine dips -- 3 sets x 30, 10 and 15 reps
~ Dumbbell inclines supersetted with stiff-arm pullovers – 3 sets x 8-10 reps
~ Standing thumbs-up curl supersetted with pulley pushdowns – 3 sets x 8-10 reps, 15-20 reps
I’ll affect leg action by doing four sets of sissy squats in the early stages of the one-hour oldies-but-goodies workout scheme.
It’s important to fuel 30 minutes before and after an oldies routine or you’ll go into default like/with the rest of the nation. Bomber Blend was made for these occasions… and for sheer joy and pleasure. When’s the last time you experienced joy and pleasure?
… He’s such a sourpuss!
God bless America and the rest of the world… El Davido Draperskivich
>>>>>
Everyone has heard of the light at the end of the tunnel, but few have experienced it… or know anyone who has. Lo and behold, Laree D has, and it is neither daylight nor the headlight of an oncoming train. It is the 3.5 hour, three-disc DVD series by Dan John called Intervention: Course Corrections for the Athlete and Trainer.
Three months ago Dan John gave an in-depth seminar about the fundamentals and intricacies of correct training structure for the focused athlete. Cameras rolled as he described, demonstrated and detailed on blackboards the functional movement systems and their achievement. In the ensuing months, Laree edited the raw material, arranged it for clear understanding and added files of related information to present a bright light to which few tunnels lead.
Here’s a quick look: Dan John -- Intervention, new release!
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