The Triple Ds
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As the sky turned from blue to gray and the temperature went from 100 to 60, things started to feel a little dismal around here. I enjoy the cozy winter months, but it’s still unsettling, and brings up this week’s subjects of study: discouragement and disappointment. No, I’m not kidding and you can’t leave, the doors are bolted from the outside.
Initial research reveals the most popular fixes for discouragement and disappointment, or the Double Ds as they’re known in musclebuilding circles, are consuming pizza and drinking beer, followed by bowls of ice cream while watching television. Bags of chips are usually within reach.
Discouragement and disappointment in large or small doses affect everyone in every area of life. These negative conditions, if they’re severe and recurrent, can lead to depression. And depression can be more than a temporary misery; it can become a chronic and crushing disease. We then confront the awesome Triple Ds: discouragement, disappointment and depression.
Gratefully, we’re dealing with states of mind and facts of life over which we have some control, more control than we sometimes think. And where we have control we must apply it, or we have no control at all. We have submission... the Ds control us.
As musclebuilders, our hefty bouts with the iron diminish or even eliminate many of the causes of these debilitating emotional assaults. We set uplifting goals and, engaging our talents, desires and potential, we strive to achieve them. We fight, we fall, we pick ourselves up, wipe ourselves off and press on, developing always as we go. It works every time, all the time.
Yet discouragement and disappointment are unavoidable, almost necessary. The fact that we’re alive and self-directed makes us vulnerable to discouragement, and the need to put one foot before the other leaves us wide open to disappointment. Any of our crushed hopes, ordinary mistakes, everyday accidents, accumulated malfunctions, misunderstandings and tribulations can trigger these crude assailants.
But we’re specifically talking about situations relating to musclebuilding, fat loss, weight training and getting in shape, where many of us experience more disappointment and discouragement than fulfillment and success. This disproportion is an illusion, unfair, insufferable and deadly to our mission, and can lead to quitting.
And failure in one area of life distresses the entire life.
This success-and-failure balance is an illusion, because musclebuilders are seeking regular, measurable development. Hopes are naturally high and sometimes greedy pushers of supplements guarantee quick, almost sudden, growth. When struck with reality, the lifter encounters the Ds and falters, seeing only the lack of swift progress, unaware of or unimpressed by the slow, hard-earned benefits of the efforts.
Here’s where the strong are separated from the weak: press on or pull back.
I suspect we’re dealing with two natures of the twin beasts: there’s disappointment and discouragement we bring upon ourselves, and there’s the discouragement and disappointment that broadsides us while we’re innocently occupying our space. Both are destructive, the former requiring preemptive action in the form of consideration, caution and discipline, and the latter, strength from the heart as the conditions envelop us.
Allow me to offer a couple of general examples, a field upon which we might study the wild beasts in their habitat and render them harmless... or, at least, less harmful.
Foremost, the disappointment and discouragement that result from the idiotic things we do by our own hands, the things we have immediate control over. Your imagination, please.
1) The periodic treat of sitting on the couch watching television, eating pizza and drinking beer engenders the Double Ds.
I don’t care if it’s leap year, NASCAR tryouts, Thursday night with the girls at the Bowlorama or you’re just hungry and pooped. Random gorging is trouble. This is a large, waist-sized problem and it’s gonna cost big time. The dominoes have begun to fall. Discouragement and disappointment hover like buzzards.
You’re digging yourself a pit.
You have just set yourself up for hardcore D&D. Are you willing to pay that price? Think about it. At some point you will feel weak, fat and stupid. Guilt is a mean companion, unrelenting, almost sadistic.
Disdain and rationales accompany this self-cast disappointment: I’ll do what I want, when and where I want, you’ll say, I’m free. No, no, no. That lie is as old as the hills; you won’t accept it and you’ll continue to berate yourself.
You want to get in shape, you want to build muscle and you want to be strong. But you lack discipline and are unable to deny yourself for a day.
Or it’s going to take forever, with a mountain of cliff-hanging discouragements and rocky disappointments along the way. But you don’t understand, some of you say, it’s my mother, my father, the kids, the stress, the deeply engrained habits, the culture, the career... yeah, yeah, yeah.
Excuses have no place in the life of a bomber. Fact is, you ate pizza and drank beer while you sat on the couch and watched the tube. You did it before and you’ll do it again and that’s the way it works.
The solution I offer is composed of 10 two-word commands, uncomplicated, unequivocal, indisputable: Stop it. Right now. Don’t submit. Train hard. Eat right. Be strong. Know thyself. Love thyself. Be happy. Be wise.
Keep those handy; line them up on the shelf with your Bomber Blend. Use regularly and generously, but not carelessly. May be taken separately or together, with food or on an empty stomach. Savor for maximum absorption.
Some folks have real problems. To them I offer my heartfelt best wishes and prayers.
The second loss of control, equally devastating, deals with the iron, or, rather, not dealing with it.
2) I’m skipping a workout because I feel icky; I’m snoozy; there’s a chill in the air and the shadows are long; I have a knot in my shoelace; it’s Vice President’s Day. The list of excuses is endless and embarrassing.
There are times when we are absolutely compelled to miss a workout -- plagues, earthquakes, the fiery end of civilization as we know it, we’re out of... gasp... Bomber Blend -- and times when we don’t need an excuse. But I’m talking about those times that indicate the development of chronic misbehavior and irresponsibility. Several discarded workouts a year are permissible, three or four a month and we’re in trouble.
An authentic weightlifter does not skip workouts. A true seeker of muscle and might cannot omit a training session; a musclehead wouldn’t know how and a bodybuilder would rather die. Unmotivated imposters miss workouts. Hapless wimps and doodlers let their workouts slide, sure, but not men and women of steel.
The next time the urge to skip a workout arises, will you regard it as an opportunity to exhibit strength or a moment before a catastrophe? Will you submit to the moment or fight it with all your strength? If you choose the former, you lose. The catastrophe and you become one.
A workout abandoned is an opportunity lost. It weakens the structure. Worse yet, it indicates a structure that is already weak.
Every bad gym day becomes a great gym day once you pass the front door. The cold ugly weights melt in your hands and become as a sculpture to the lover of art. Soreness dissipates like the morning dew, and the strength of the warm sun fills your veins. What was lifeless or hopeless is revived by the renewed power of inspired limbs. The gym enables, enlightens and excites. The workout creates, restores and fulfills.
And you receive, respond and progress.
Yes, I’m almost done. Some of you are ready to fly; I hear the rumble and feel the vibrations.
The disappointment and discouragement that result from circumstances beyond our control must be met straight on and handled with courage. These are the dreadful incidents of which half of life is comprised. Where there is happiness, so is there misery. We know pleasure to the degree we know pain. Joy and sorrow are doled out in near-equal proportions.
One thing I know: The backbone and guts needed to lift weights develop as do the muscles, and these collective attributes are essential in countering enemies of all kinds.
The disciplined characters who work out, eat right and meet these tests regularly are those who survive the thrusts of disappointment and discouragement, and are seldom depressed. Like osmosis, the iron and steel has a way of entering the body and lining it with strength and durability. The sets and reps provide resilience and internal energy. And their combined application heightens the spirits.
We have too much to live for to be grounded and weak.
DD
*****
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