IRONONLINE MOTIVATIONAL MOMENTS

Lost Cause?

Monday evening after work:
Walked in the door, looked around. Didn't see who I was looking for, although saw someone who could help me out. After a brief discussion found out that, he won't be back until Wednesday. Talked with someone else and found out time. Questions arose as to where I've been, what I've been up to. The usual.

Wednesday 1300:
Called, checking to see if who I was trying to get ahold of was going to be there, while he didn't answer I was told that he would be there. Same questions arose.

Wednesday 1545:
Arrived at my destination walked in, was greeted by warm smiles and greetings. After a brief discussion with someone, and a couple of minutes of waiting I finally got to talk with who I needed to: JR (owner of JR's Powerhouse). We sat and talked, he knew why I was there: It'd been a month and a half since I've been in the gym. He asked what I've been doing since then, and why I hadn't made it in for that 45 day or so span. After more discussion, and such, I was feeling pretty good. Knew I could get in, and wanted to get in. That thought had been a slow, relentlessly building thought in my head. He asked what my goal was for working out: Was it for building mass and getting as big as I could or was it to supplement my Tae Kwon Do. I told him it was to supplement my TKD more than anything else. Strength, endurance and flexibility. Weight-loss and size will come with time, as will everything else. He showed me a couple of things, and he gave a call to another early morning workout rat that hasn't been in for while also. When I left, I felt refreshed knowing that I had taken a step to getting back into the gym. The key thing I was missing: I got too complexed, overrun with tons of information and couldn't sort it all out. "Keep it simple. You're a very inquisitive person, that explains how you go confused." he said.

Wednesday evening:
During TKD, realized how weak I was feeling. Time had taken it's toll on me. Now, I'm getting bruised when I wasn't before. Confirmation of what I already knew. At 20 minutes to 10pm I bid my wife good night. She commented that I was going to bed early. I told her why, and also told her to kick me out of bed when the alarm goes off.

Thursday 0400:
Alarm goes off, I instinctively reach over and hit the snooze. I lay there for a second and my eyes start to close. I realize I'm supposed to get up, but the grogginess is overiding. Just at that time, I feel a knee in my back. I reach over, turn the alarm off and climb out of bed. Stumble downstairs. I take my multi-vitamin, the stench of it nearly gags me, followed by a piece of toast with peanut butter, an apple and large glass of milk. I pack my lunch, and double check my gear. I feel I'm forgetting something as I'm running out the door. couldn't be, I've packed the night before and more than triple checked everything before I left. I slide a cd into the radio, the Title song for "Conan" thunders through the speakers. Very motivating.

I arrive at the gym, no one's there except the worker, and it's open 10 minutes early. Cool, I drop my stuff off in the locker and hit the tread mill. After a couple of minutes my lungs burn, but I keep going. I feel the blood start to flow, and I'm there. I get warmed up and head over to the bench. Lying down, I grab the bar and do a couple of empty lifts to get reaquainted. Loading the bar, I begin to lift now. It comes back slow, but not like when I first started. I do a set of 12, no problem. The pump starts to hit, I'm hooked. I superset with low-cable pulls(rows).

I work my way around the gym hitting chest and back. As the weights go with my control, I'm in harmony. Gone are the ill-feelings I've been experiencing, my life worries, and also all thoughts outside of the gym. In a way, it's my therapy. I keep up the pace, concentrating on my task at hand. The pump is continuing to build, finally I reach my limit on declines. I struggle to lift the dumbells to my legs as I prepare for my final set. I get a few reps out, then lose form. I rack the weights, drink the last of my water and head to the treadmill again. I force out 15 minutes of interval running.

As I'm getting ready for work, I look in the full length mirror. Gone are the cuts that were starting show, in it's place is a smooth look. Gone, are the gains I've accomplished. I'm starting over, but I have a base that won't take much to correct to build a good foundation upon. My workouts at home, good that they are, don't mean anything when they are few and far between.

Today, I'm eating clean, drinking my water and a protein shake for once. Temptations arise at every corner: donuts, sweets, baked goods, sugar cereal. I see people running for the donuts at work, and think to myself I don't need it. I reach down and grab my healthy snack: a Bio-X bar I've had for a little while now. My lunch consists of lettuce/tuna salad and cottage cheese on the side. Dinner hasn't been planned yet. The good life of healthy living is returning now to it's fullness. It never died, just got overrun by bad things.

Am I a lost cause to this lifestyle? Time will tell. I would venture to say "No" at this point. Will I continue on? I'll do my best. My accountability? Check with me next Friday to see how I'm coming along. I'm always learning, as we all should, but now I'm taking easy and going with the flow.

Thanks to everyone who deserves it; Dave and Laree, everyone on the list, JR, and last but not least my wife who puts up with me and puts her knee in my back to get me out of bed.

Shawn

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